So tell me why Desperate Housewives just pulled a One Tree Hill. For those of you who don't know. This season of One Tree Hil is a flash forward in time for the cast beyond College and somewhere into middle adulthood. Which, should we say for some was right on target with their real ages. Come on, even when we were watching Dawson's Creek, we knew those kids were too grown, and no bodies were that hot was in our high schools. But even so we should be willing to go along with this ride. One Tree Hill has never had the best acting, so I won't go into detail if you're not interested because I haven't been watching as diligently as I should have. After the redhead sank the limo and Dan went to jail I've just been blah with that show. I love that Lucas is a writer, I love that they try to portray writers in a sexy more attractive light. I'm all for it. I think all writers are sexy in their own way. I could go on, but I know what you're here for. The Desperate Housewives scoop.
Now I'll admit I haven't been watching Desperate Housewives as diligently either. But I pick it up every now and then. They've had some crazy stuff go on too, but they have a good formula. And...I just can't get enough Eva Longoria. That hair, the skin tone. She's perfect. I like Marcia Cross too. Actually all the girls have grown on me. I even like the new housewife, Katherine (Dana Delaney). She's finally made her way into the group, ushering out the useless role of Edie. I never really liked Edie. She was one of those useless human beings who was just manipulative, self serving, and not even pretty enough to save face about it. The thing we pull from the other ladies is that though they may do wrong, at the end of the day they are essentially wives, mothers, and caregivers. Edie couldn't even take care of her son. When you have kids...get your shit together. It may be hard, I may not know what it's like. But if you make the decision to have a baby...grow up and take care of it. Don't leave it to anyone else, unless you're giving it up for adoption for people who can really care for it. Single parents included. You can do it alone. We don't all come from ideal homes. Single parents don't get enough credit where its due. I know single parents who bust their hump and do a damn good job. Anyway, I'm off on a tangent.
Let's go over the crazy. How crazy is it that the real Dylan is dead and that she was replaced by a Romanian look-alike. It's crazy, but it makes good tv. Because it's just crazy enough to believe. Besides, with that neighborhood's history of dead babies being buried at the bottom of pools, suicides and frozen husbands in the basement, it's no surprise that Katherine had all those demons in her closet. If you thought they were going to get a normal neighbor, you were wrong. What's funny is that the Gay neighbors are the most normal ones. The strangest problems I've seen them deal with were that shitteous fountain and that crass ice sculpture. Aww you thought the baby Angel was cute? A cupid-like creature at a wedding? How cliche. Bite your tongue off if you liked it. Well...I like swans...Ice swans are cute. I actyally thought the ice castle with the vodka moat was cute. Well, to each his or her own. (That quote is usually so sexist.) Anyway, I want to talk about the future, because apparently it went from the next morning, to a week after, then to five years down the road. It's kind of nuts.
The Solis Family
Why is Gabrielle's kid so chubby? Cute...But Chubby. I'm not saying to be mean...but it's just that we all know Gabrielle Solis. For her to have fat children is like Victoria Beckham wearing something that isn't skin-tight. It's just not natural for her. She was dressed so frumpy. Maybe you thought she had changed, until you saw how upset she was they were messing with her designer clothing. This story lines should be fun. I hope Carlos has his sight back or he has at least learned how to fully deal with his blindness. I'm all for representing everybody in the spectrum of characters. But unless his blindness is serving the story line, they need to correct. I'm a story teller by nature. I need to see it leading somewhere. Because otherwise I'm on the Island with Jack and Kate running from the "The Others," waiting to get rescued. ("Lost" for those who didn't catch on.)
The Scavo's
Whoa...So her kids are in their teens now. I knew when I was watching Tom say goodbye to his little girl that, that story line was hinting towards something more. That girl is going to be hell next season. She will be older, wiser, and even more sinister. But it seems like Lynette already has her hands full with her car-stealing boys. I kind of love it. Those twins have always been trouble. But I like their mischief.
I suppose Lynette's cancer is in remission. She survived five years, so I am excited to see where she goes now.
The Delfino(t)s
Who the hell was Susan kissing? It was not our Mike. I did not go through all that crap with Mike to have her end up with someone else. Homeboy found his stolen son, holding people at gunpoint, getting hit by Orsen with a car, going into a coma, had to fight to win Susan back, then she trekked into the woods to get him back under some crazy ceremony. It's too much shit I done gone through with Mike and Susan. And to see her coming home kissing some other dude. (Namely that Neo Nazi on Grey's,(The Ambulance Rising Above Episode I like to call it) and I think he was also on Queer as Folk.) But there are some burning questions there.
The Van De Kamp's
What is up with Bree's fashion sense? She's gotten darker in her old age. I don't like it. I prefer her sunny and Martha Stewartish. But it's a new direction. Where the hell is that baby she stole for her daughter? I have barely seen it? Is it still alive? Did the daughter come take it back? Did I miss something? Anyway she forgave Orsen...which might be a weird relation to why Mike is gone. But who knows. I want to know.
The Mayfair's
So Dylan went to Paris and now she's engaged. Where is Katherine's husband? Did they leave him out on purpose? Maybe he left her after he found out the truth. We can see she's finally part of the group now. I like that. She's had enough time to get in deep with the girls.
Well wherever the show takes us, I am willing to watch the first three episodes. They have enough time to fill in little details that we might have missed out on. The time gap will be the mystery in itself. There might have been some exciting murders and scandals in between. Because just when you thought you knew everything, the rug is torn right out from under you.
That's my Rapport, stay tuned for that Final Grey's blog.
Doc McV...PEACE
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